Brass band

Loud music filled the room, making it hard to hear anything else. Finally, she might have a rest from the whirlpool of her thoughts. They were slowly dragging her to the bottom. Today she was too tired to fight and had decided to let her body and mind being rocked and pushed in all directions by the strong currents. She had woven a mantra around the concepts of flexibility and adaptiveness. Her mind and body, closely working together, were shaken by the storms, bent to their limits, twisted in curious knots, and yet they were still rooted.

The music was bringing her back to the years spent with her high school brass band. She remembered it as the first time she had expressed a strong desire to be part of something outside of her family circle. She had gained independence then, thanks to her musicians mates. In a smooth and agile manner, they had created a space for her to fit in. She had adjusted to this somewhat distorted image and found her place. Impermanence was at the heart of the band, members came and went. The musical line was each time slightly shifted but somehow kept its spirit. During the ten year anniversary of their graduation, the current band had played for them and she had felt so joyful upon recognising the musical theme. It was more mature, as if mimicking her own coming of age, it had become adult, or was rather trying to.

Ten more years had passed and she hadn’t join the school’s celebration this time around. She wasn’t ready for the compassion of her former classmates and certainly didn’t want to face their egoistic empathy. She was still in the turmoil of last year events. Turbulences were ebbing and flowing. Listening to the music she understood how similar her state was to the odd being that the school brass band impersonated. It gave her hope. She saw clearly now that her own musical line was still there, slightly displaced but with an untouched core. It resonated with the band’s one, getting slowly in phase, growing in strength. Laying on the floor and listening to the music, she was, for the first time in months, appeased, just about to start looking forward to the future.

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Inspired by https://www.thefirstline.com/ winter 2020 issue. Check it out! and check out my other takes on this first line :)